Marriage is a tough journey whereby the couples meet with several obstacles along the way. The race is tough and few make it to the finish line. The main among the many obstacles that is a global marriage killer is infidelity. When a couple says “I do”, their partner assumes that she or he is the sole owner of emotional and/ or sexual exclusivity. When this right is denied or violated by a spouse cheating or in simpler terms, having an affair out of wedlock, it hurts so much and in most cases, leads to divorce or a dysfunctional marriage.
What Are The Causes of Infidelity
- Emotional disconnection is the most common cause of infidelity. The partner committing infidelity may feel unappreciated, sad and lonely. From here, the person may feel angry and resentful towards the primary partner and start confiding in someone else. In most cases it starts like a friendship and develops into a more serious intimacy as time goes by. This secondary partner starts to take the role of the primary partner as more is confided to him/her.
- Physical attraction which comes in when one partner feels dissatisfied is also a source of infidelity. The affected partner feels more satisfying while out with the secondary partner than with the primary partner. They seem to mistake honeymoon phase excitement of sex with satisfaction. They are just in a new relationship and that is why it feels better than the primary relation. No chemistry is here, but the wildness, the liberation and excitement that comes with a new thing. It can be compared to a quick fix that is brought about by alcohol or drugs…..the secondary relationship will not last; working on redefining sex in their current relationship can do the trick here.
What Can Be Done To Minimize The Risk of Infidelity
- Make sure when in a relationship, to communicate to your partner your likes and dislikes about sex; what turns you on or off. Communicating about your sexual feelings and desire is very important.
- Don’t assume, ask questions and listen to your partner. Develop that atmosphere whereby you can talk about anything sexual. Remember, you are two different individuals brought up from different backgrounds. Opening up to each other about sexual matters might be tough, but if you develop a question and answer session between yourselves, this might work wonders.
- Don’t be shy to try up new things “sexual” with your partner. Trying out new things will spice up your sex life and with that in mind, instead of you committing infidelity, you will be ready and willing do it in the safety of your home.
- Most people start affairs to distract themselves when they are unhappy or bored. Bare in mind that, this distraction has consequences. Even if you are not discovered immediately, it will eventually come out. Avoid distractions.
What Are The Consequences of An Infidelity
The main and worst consequence of infidelity is, it leads to lack of trust and with it, broken relationship. If children are involved, they will end up innocently suffering because of a one time distraction of a partner.
It is best to avoid infidelity at all costs, but in case it happens, it will be better if a trained counselor is involved to salvage the relationship. This can be done through individual therapy in order to give each partner space to pour out their heart feelings – this is the start of a healing process. What breaks the marriage is not the act of sex outside marriage, but the meaning the aggrieved partner attaches to the act once the information is made known.
This post is brought to you by Lucy Brown from Auvisa.org. Auvisa.org is a professional Australian visa agency, founded in 2011 by migration lawyers. Lucy worked as a teach for 11 years before joing Auvisa.org.
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