Cheating… Why Should Women get all the Blame?

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cheating man

In a previous article entitled ‘Why Men Cheat… Since you wanted to know‘ it is not at all surprising that a man would have those opinions; however it is of note that there are obvious blind spots in statements made.

I believe if a woman can please you once, she can do it again. I must agree however that some of us really do not take the time out to really keep up our fashionable, sexiness after marriage and kids; Yes, I know managing the house, the spouse, the kids and the job is a hand full but ladies, we know how to make things work so we got to figure out how to maintain our sexy look.

Men, please understand that with age our bodies change, so don’t be naive and think that the young hot honey you fell in love with is still going to look the same from now unto eternity. Hello, you don’t look the same either… how awful it is for you to try to jump ship while we have to deal with the mess you have left behind.

I often say that communication is the key for any relationship to work well and in all the complaining that men do, how many times have they really had a sit down alone time talk with their girlfriends/wives about all the “issues” they are having? Remember you guys are partners, a team and what affects one will affect the other. In your discussion or talk, problems can be tackled, difficulties can be addressed and solutions and a consensus can be made. Then you both put in the needed work after that.  If you don’t have problems to work out, how can you pass the test of “for better or worse”?

My mother always say; “if you are the only person that is attracted to this man, then it is either something is wrong with him or something is wrong with you but something is wrong”. This, to me means, in every relationship there are going to be times when either party will have someone else being attracted to them. What they will have to do is to know that not every desire or feeling you have, you should act on, that faithfulness is of utmost importance in every relationship, that self control is necessary at all times and setting of boundaries with people who wants to be in play has to be made. “Want all, loose all”.

So what are you actually saying? You feel cheated so you cheat? How silly is that, suppose the person you are cheating with is just doing the things you like to woo you away and then dumps you like garbage when you actually fall for it? Then your previous life is wrecked and you possibly cannot get it back. Or, suppose that person does the things you like and then after you have committed again to her, she “changes” too, what will you do then, leave again?

Many guys say, women change after marriage, well I beg to differ. The men are the ones who change and the rippling effect is shown in the wife. Ladies, do you remember when he earnestly wanted your attention and affection? You get nice calls in the day to say “how are you?” or “is everything okay?”, and little gifts like a rose on his way home from work or take you out for dinner or a nice long walk in the park. Where did all of that go as soon as he puts on the ring? All persistence is gone, men, don’t you think women feel just as cheated and betrayed by you who gave that false impression and then take it back in the comfort of marriage?

Let me know in comments what you think.

Photo credit: ©iStock.com/junial

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Karlene Smith is a Registered Nurse, Registered Midwife and currently studying her MSc in Nurse Anesthesia. Karlene likes to write about parenting, health, and relationship issues. Connect with her on LinkedIn

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